You Can't Go Home Again

With all apologies to Thomas Wolfe, I have been reflecting on the past and my unwavering fondness for it. In light of my mother's impending trip to India, my single status, and general rootlessness, I have been waxing nostalgic for those halcyon days of my youth. Trouble is, they kinda sucked. Sour grapes, yes; for I was relatively well liked in school, made reasonable grades, had all of my cares (and most of my wants) taken care of. That said, I was also paralyzed with fear-procrastinating even the simplest of tasks rather than screwing up. I recently had the occasion to see a friend from college who reminded me that the hard realities of the past are often worn down by the passage of time into soft, fuzzy-colored memories that portray every thing as infinately better than the present. I resolve to emerge from the 'summer of my discontent' if not a more optimistic person, then one who has a more realistic perspective and lower expectations of life.

Rejuveniles-R-Us

After yesterday's "Talk of the Nation" I conteplated my 'grup' status. Besides my non-traditional job, I think that my taste in music most betrays my Peter Pan syndrome. Although MTV:Original Flavor rarely shows videos, I have MTV2, MTVJams, MTVHits, Vh1, Vh1Soul, VH1Classic, and Fuse. Summer pop music is invading my brain!! My faves: Rihanna "S.O.S" and "Unfaithful", Gnarls Barkley "Crazy", Christina Aguilera "Ain't No Other Man", Shakira (featuring Wyclef Jean) "Hips Don't Lie." Please don't judge too harshly; I still bust out my highschool music-I have a feeling that I will be an 80-year-old woman, rocking out to "The Cure" in my flowered housecoat!

Happy Birthday, George W?

special edition...its linktastic!
Everyone has a birthday, right? Although it is hard to believe that George W was actually born and not found lying under some rock sixty years ago, it's not hard to imagine how he might spend his "special day." Will he kick back and watch some wholesome morally correct movie on the Disney Channel featuring Tia and Tamara Mowry who turn 28 today? Maybe he'll be cold kickin' it with Curtis Jackson, ahem, 50 Cent, a fellow teetotaler and wordsmith who celebrates his 31st today. While they are hanging out in the White House screening room, they could watch Moonlighting's Allyce Beasley, Miss DiPesto (52 today) or one of Geoffrey Rush's many wonderful movies (he's 55!) Knowing the Dub, the old Batman TV show (Featuring Burt Ward-61-as Robin) or anything featuring Ned Beatty (69) is more his speed. That guy's been in everything so Mr. Prez has a lot to choose from. Maybe he could just call Merv Griffin (81) and have him send over a reel of "greatest hits." After the entertainment, GW could arm wrestle Sly Stallone and see which of the two has made it to 60 in better shape. George's thoughts could turn to the philosophical, the ultimate question: is there anything after death? George could consult the Dalai Lama(71)and Della Reese. I know whose advice he'll take...Della's 'cause she's older (75)!

However the President spends his birthday, I hope and pray that this birthday gives him the wisdom and mellowness of age-making it to my next birthday may depend on it!

Happy Birthday, US of A!

Independence Day, our nation's birthday. In solidarity with my enslaved ancestors, I worked today...people love ice cream on a summer day. I might as well exploit it! As far as nations go, we are in our adolescence and it shows. In the years to come, I hope we find maturity, self-restraint, and the ability to get along with our neighbors. Because we really know that the schoolyard bully is only acting out because he's unhappy with himself. Hope you have a safe celebration!!

The Case of Fred Meyer and His Extra-Speedy Calendar

Fred Meyer. What an ambiguous relationship I have with this store. As some of you may recall, my first Portland apartment was on 20th Place, overlooking the Freddy's loading dock. Every morning at 4:30 the delivery trucks would begin their queue to unload. If the hissing of hydraulic brakes wasn't enough, my apartment would begin to fill with diesel exhaust. Only when I moved into my present apartment did I realize how important a night of uninterrupted sleep is to my outlook on life. Fred Meyer, although probably taking a decade off of my life through noxious fumes and REM deprivation also gave me life. Need food? Freddy's. New shower curtain? Freddy's. Tube socks, tires, wine, light bulbs, board games, furniture, CDs, lottery tickets, bulk spices? Yep. One stop shopping with a local flair. The truly curious thing about Fred Meyer though, is his Extra-Speedy calendar. "Holiday Creep" is an affliction among all retail establishments. No sooner do you return from the beach from a lovely New Year's party and St. Valentine's Day cards are in the stores. I accept that the wheel of capitalism needs its grease, but why is there a "Back to School" display when Portland Public Schools just got out on June 14th! While the idea is fresh in my head, I'll go to Fred's, buy $10 worth of school supplies and donate them to the PPS for a needy kid. I'm sure they will inform me that school doesn't until September 6th.

Nerdus Maximus

After making gelato and getting the shop set up in the morning, I settle down to a tall glass of soda water and the NY Times crossword. Although I only complete the Monday and Tuesday puzzles, I still attempt the rest of the week. I also do the Oregonian's crossword which has elevated itself from little more than a repository for lame puns to a puzzle that is consistently challenging; although I do feel that it relies on overly long and obscure quotes to increase its level of difficulty. Will Shortz, the editor of the NY Times crossword puzzle and the guy who writes those puzzles on Sunday morning's NPR Weekend Edition has a new movie out; "Wordplay." Its a really engaging story about the competitors in the American Crossword Puzzle Tournament-socially awkward, yes, yet terribly passionate about competition and their recognition within their community. Check it out!